My lady bestfriend asked me to write a letter to her son who is currently attending a recollection activity. Being the responsible Ninong that I am, I have somewhat agreed to this request.. She asked me to give the boy some advice on love because he has been pretty much "twitterpated" when it comes to young love..
Remil,
There has never been a more stressful thing for an adolescent than the topic of love. Whether its a boy or a girl, it has always been the same battle: finding that special someone to call your own.
I too was a teenager once. And even in my young mind then, there was nothing more I had wanted than to have a special someone. I had crushes on several girls and tried my hardest to court them. But being not so gifted in the looks department and short of courage to express myself, I was a teenage failure.
Despite my failure then, it was not without hard-earned lessons. These things however I can share with you on your road from adolescence to adulthood.
1. Guts - Are you torpe? So was I. And it didn't get me anywhere. If there's one thing I learned from jocks who have had a long list of girlfriends in their highschool days is this: telling a girl how you feel face to face is the only way to go. Writing a letter also works but its only good for the first part. Sure they were also afraid to be rejected. But they sucked it all in and went headfirst into the unknown. In the end, it all boils down to not being afraid. Don't be afraid to be busted at first. Don't be afraid to be hurt. Don't be afraid to say the wrong words. You gotta have guts for this. After all its no guts, no glory.
2. Its a two-way street - You think you're all twisted inside because of all the drama? Guess again! Chances are, the person you're interested is too! Even if she doesn't really like you, she still goes through a lot of stress because of your actions. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. While its hard at first, feelings of love can also grow from the other side of the fence..
3. Perseverance is Key - Just because she told you off once you'd already give up? If there's one thing I learned later on from my girl friends, its that they'd really bust your ass the first time just to see if you're serious about your intentions. If I knew this then, maybe I would not have failed like I did then.. Go instead with this basic rule: if she turns you down for the third time, then its time to call it quits. In boxing this is called the "3 Knockdown Rule."
4. Statistics - If there were a population of 100 normal girls out there for you, chances are there will be up to 30 girls out there that will say "YES" and 70 will say "NO" to you. What does this mean? Just because a girl you liked turned you down (third rejection at that!) it doesn't mean that the next one will also turn you down. No matter what happens, you will never be a ZERO. You will always have a 30% chance of getting a girl to like you. Its just a matter of finding that girl! That, and improving your chances from 30% to 50% by following the next items..
5. Look Good - People are attracted to good looks. This is a fact of nature. Play sports instead of indoor computer games to get a good body. Develop a good sense of fashion. And lastly, feel good about yourself. Once you feel good about yourself, your confidence will grow with it.
6. Do Your Homework - this works for two things. A guy with good grades is the apple of many a smart girl's eye.. So keep your grades up and you just might get some attention.. The other aspect of this is to find out as much as you can about the one you are interested in. Find out her number, where she lives, who her friends are, where she goes to church, her favorite tv shows, or her kind of music etc. This way you can actually visit her at her home, set up coincidences to bump into each other in church, or have information on what to talk about when you get a chance to be alone together.. Hmm.. Nice!
7. Be Patient - Don't be in a hurry to fall in love. Take your time and have fun. Don't be jealous of those jocks who seem to switch girlfriends at the drop of a hat. Every girl out there is special. As such, you must take your time to build that special relationship.
There are a lot of other things to cherish in life other than a romantic partner. Friends and family are other things to enjoy in your youth. I may not have had luck in the love department when I was your age, but I sure had a lot of fun with friends and family instead.
Your irreverent godparent,
Godai
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